Tuesday, 6 January 2009


0.Just before the new year a body was found right next to my flat. on 28th december a local guy found a girls body on the rivers edge. She had been missing since the 9th. police had found her passport on the 12th.and on the 28th they found her body 100 metres from where the passport was found two weeks earlier.She was found under the bridge.I walk under that bridge 3 or 4 times a day. She must have lay there while this little town on the edge of london went about their festive plans.

1.In a dream last night i was on a table in one of those large meat fridges you find in the back room of a butchers shop.The walls were falls of thick syrupy ox blood and the room was slowly disappearing. After three attempts to drop the nightmare, and one brief stay in some interim corridor between being awake and being heavily set in dream, i was back in the room, in the real world, not completely sure what that is at the moment, but in a room nonetheless.

2.getting out of the city on NYE was fresh hell. Ushered along the southbank and around waterloo with 250,000 other sheep as if we were the only survivors of armageddon and the police were in a rush. Nearly stabbed, twice. Phone fell under a train not scheduled to depart til 7am. That kind of thing.

3.Its sad and cold here and the police are idiots who spurt unprovoked bile and understand their jobs to be a performance piece in brutal machismo and view the festive season as a time where everyone on earth is drunk and therefore has to be arrested and detested.

4.Im not sure how welcome we are here anyway. Its like that scene in The Long Goodbye when Marlowe says to his cell mate "remember its not you in here, its only your body".

5.There are many positives though and we will make it thru January.

stay clean